Saturday Sampler – Catching Up on Oscars, 50 Shades Anger, and Life

My friends! I missed you! It’s been a busy, crazy few weeks, but we must catch up.

Let’s reach way back to the Oscars. What a boring show that was, huh? What I remember most was my sinking hopes for Neil Patrick Harris, as he stumbled through the show with less than funny jokes and pun after terrible pun. NPH is a talented dude, but maybe he should have contracted out to some known Oscar writing helpers on this one. For me, (note, I missed the awkward John Travolta face touching moment,) the highlight of the evening truly was the Lady Gaga ‘Sound of Music’ medley. The first time I realized Lady Gaga could actually sing was on an episode of Oprah, where she played the piano and sang “You and I.” After the rough couple of years she’s had and the failure of her last solo album, I was happy to see her return to things she clearly loves with the Tony Bennett standards record and this performance. She sounded great, and the Julie Andrews appearance made it even more special. Good for you, Gaga!

I definitely had a verklempt moment at this point.
I got a little verklempt, at this point.

I saw 50 Shades of Grey, guys. I actually wanted to write an entire post about how silly I think everyone in the world America is for freaking out that we’re “ruining society” by allowing people to see these “Godless acts” of sexuality, like it’s something no one has ever mentioned before. Okay, I get the argument that perhaps one could see it as “celebrating violence” against women and that’s very, very bad, BUT if anyone making that argument actually read these terribly, embarrassingly written books, they would know that the sexual trysts in question are consensual, by two adults, who SPOILER ALERT…………………….. end up married with babies! How much more heartland America can you get? And if you think things like this aren’t happening in homes across the country, you’re kidding yourself. Sexual experimentation in a trusted, loving relationship is not something you should have to “write a letter to your daughter” about. Chances are, she’s not all that shocked by it. Sorry. Did you like all the “quotations” I used here? I gathered them for my repertoire over the last few weeks of reading upset-mom Facebook posts.

The second part about 50 Shades is that it is a very weakly written story- and the characters of Anastasia and Christian are far less sympathetic and believable than even your favorite sitcom characters. It’s hard to care about them when they are so vapid and predictable. I was surprised to find I actually came around to like Dakota Johnson’s portrayal of Ana, and I think she added some extra depth to the character in the form of humor and feminism that the book didn’t necessarily display. The novel’s Ana was so busy having one-way conversations with her “inner goddess,” that she didn’t have time to realize maybe she was the one with just as many issues as Christian. As for Jamie Dornan- meh. Left me cold. All over my body.

Don't look moms, Jamie Dornan is here to scandalize your daughters.
Don’t look moms, Jamie Dornan is here to scandalize your daughters.

Look. I’m all riled up now. Should have just written a whole post about it. Truth is, I couldn’t because I was too busy with my new creative endeavors this week. It’s invigorating to be in a positive professional atmosphere again. I look forward to all the good that’s to come. Hubs and I also decided to put the house hunting on hold, and just go ahead and rent something while we save some more dollaz. Not an easy decision, but we’re trying to embrace it and get excited to FINALLY have our own space again, our own routine, and our own blender. I miss my stuff, man. It’s all been living in a climate-controlled storage unit in Ann Arbor for just about 2 years. I can’t wait to get settled in.

And of course, yet again, I am dedicating the next 14 days to “stop the bleeding” on the health front, put down the cookies, and cleanse my system. STAT plan time, and for real- I mean it. March 1st is here tomorrow. Roll your eyes, and then let’s get moving!

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